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Dealing with the emotion of

I am an eternal optimist. It drives some people in my family nuts, being that they tend toward the melancholy, what if mentality. That's not altogether wrong, it's just not my DNA make up. Walking through loss in the last 365 days because there have been times the emotion of it is uncomfortable at best and alarming at worst. In short, dealing with grief is annoying for me.

In recent weeks I have dove a little deeper into the grief that tends to hang around for, in my opinion, an exorbitant amount of time. In typical me fashion I began to research and test out some modalities that may help me- frequency tools being one.

During a session of playing around with tuning forks, my friend (emotion counselor who uses a myriad of modalities!) she made an astounding discovery.

Apparently the tuning forks (frequency never lies) revealed that the loss of my husband and subsequently my children’s father, was an incredible shock, so much show that I had tremendous shock deep in my bones. My bones were vibrating in a way that showed traumatic shock. Deep down in my bones, people. Given the fact that I immediate burst into tears, I knew this modality was spot on. Someone can mention my husband's passing and it brings little to no visible response now, but that rung so loudly that the body responded immediately.

For weeks I have pondered and prayed on how do I remove the shock from my bones? The revelation that not only was the loss difficult, but it was so out of the blue, so unthinkable that I received the information and experience through the frame of shock. We all think loss creates grief, but this is one reason why listening to the body and soul and not walking into assumptions of what we think is the real issue is key.

The challenge is, I have no grid for shock and removing it from my body or anyone else’s. Shock is a new emotion for me though I suppose it would be a fairly common one. Looking back on clients I can only think that they too must have been experiencing shock, and maybe, just maybe, they felt it in their bones!


Through this past year have stepped away from decreeing a thing, declaring my future etc because I have had a difficult time reconciling this type of practice with the facts that are before me. These are the hard evidences that I am now without my partner, raising our children, helping them wade through the enormity of grief, running a few businesses, and ministry. As an emotion coach, as someone who has ministered to kids who are missing one or both parents, I am acutely aware of the damage and trauma that can sink so deep yet not resurface until an ill timed moment. The devil certainly does keep a list of things that will hit at just the right time and season. I share this as an aside, so that you all understand speaking out a word isn't always the right thing at that right time. You can't decree a dish clean in the sink and it be so. One must pick up a sponge, soap and put a little elbow grease in to remove the grime.

So shock.

In the bones.

I’ve been thinking of essential oils that are good the bones, Valor and Wintergreen. Marjoram too. Goodness, the whole raindrop technique collection if I’m honest. But some of those are more muscle related. Valor and Wintergreen are the bone oils.

Besides, Marjoram is for anger and when I inhale this one, it smells incredibly vile. Yes, I have some anger, the oil read my mail.

Wintergreen is absorbed into skin quickly and acts like a numbing agent… hmmm. A numbing agent, to the immense emotional pain I experience in the evenings? Perhaps. Let’s keep investigating this one.

Wintergreen is similar to cortisone, supports healthy blood circulation and cools irritation. Well, I certainly have felt irritated a few times recently.

Ok so between this one and Valor I think I may be onto something- except, how does one apply Wintergreen and Valor to the entire skeletal system? There is no pain point to speak of, no location I can apply. All of a sudden I feel like a new oiler wanting to text someone saying, where do I apply this??

The answer is simple.

On my feet, along the spinal vita flex points.

When you consider that the rise in osteoporosis is high in our culture, it begs the question, how are all the older people suddenly finding an increase in bone disorders, and, can it be prevented? My unofficial research suggest we have an alarming amount of people who have gone through a shocking loss, in every sense of that word, yet never quite pinpointed the true emotional pain behind it. We look to the big contenders like sadness, grief, possibly anger, but shock? This was never on my radar. But when the practitioner said, “the loss hit you so hard there was shock” I immediately broke down. My physical body knew the truth and to a degree found such relief on this discovery.

My bones don’t feel like they hurt or have any emotional situations, but somehow my spirit and soul understood immediately the words of my friend “the shock was so great, you felt it in your bones.

You see, trapped emotions affects literally ever are of your life. You work, your family, your friendships, your ministry- everything. There is nothing left untouched by your stuffed emotions, no matter how diligent you are to segregate them out.


In review-

When we find there is the emotion of shock there are some ideal steps to take. When the shock is from a death, obviously there is absolutely nothing we can do to right the situation. We must acknowledge that part of it and ride the wave of emotion. Ignoring it will only cause a greater situation down the road.

Using an oil like Wintergreen will take you a long way toward healing the body from shock. Applying it diligently to the vita flex points on your feet, and then diffusing throughout the day will help the body release the trapped emotions.

Journaling, this is so profound for dealing with an emotion that was previously unknown. I have scads of papers, that I will not be saving, jotting down thoughts, perceptions, frustrations etc that have helped me see truth, that have helped me be totally and brutally honest with myself and the Lord. Something few people have the courage to do. Oh, that's where Valor comes in.

If this write up has pinged something, please comment below or message me in private.

This is part of unofficial research for something new and I want to see if anyone else has the same experience or if this is a one off.

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